There's a beautiful feeling of "summer is here" the first time you walk in the house, realize the a/c is on, and it feels good.

The sun finally came out today. It's been cloudy and raining all week, sort of the blah weather that makes everyone go "ugh" and except for not having sun to wake me up, I really don't mind.

After a week of constant, steady rain/mist, the trees have full leaves, the lawn is green, and I even have grass sprouting around the base of the trees, where there's usually not enough water to support it. Spring needs a good soaking to fully support the season... now we're looking like we're ready for summer.

Of all the billion things I have to do, the magazine stack was getting way too high. 8 when I started tackling it yesterday, then I checked the mail and got a new one, but I still have it down to 6. There are worse ways to spend a morning.

It's the daily things I miss. The little small talk around the house, the kiss-and-a-cuddle before bed. The what's-for-dinner, the what're-you-doing-tonight, who's-coming-over and did-you-pick-up-any-beer. There's a daily rhythm to sharing one's life, and it's the rhythm I miss. The big things are only once a year, the every day made up our life.

Life takes unexpected turns.

March 20-27 we cruised for my 30th birthday, a big thing a long time coming, on which we both enjoyed simple things like a beer on deck and spending time with friends.

April 3 we spent time with his side for his grandmother's funeral, again cherishing the time with family.

April 12 he was taken from me in a car accident. Life is uncertain, to say the least.

Friends and family are being very supportive, and I am eternally grateful for them.

It's been a very warm March, for which we're not exactly complaining (except those of us in flood plains, perhaps). A welcome side effect of this is that the formerly 6 ft piles of snow are now nil.

And the deck is completely clear.

And, altho still struggling, the world is slowly starting to turn green.

Sunday brunch is a recurring small pleasure for me.

Today, I had homemade bread in the freezer from Valentine's Day. Thawed it out and made French toast with it - nice, thick slices of an egg bread soaked in egg/milk/vanilla/cinnamon batter. A little bit of maple syrup and coffee and that's a damn good brunch.

I shovelled off the deck last week. Almost 2 feet of snow, covering up 2 inches of ice (the ice is still there).

It's glorious being able to walk out on the deck and inhale deeply again.

Snow can be a wonderful thing to experience, or a huge issue. Largely, it's all in the way you look at things.

Shovelling yesterday was rough and I hurt today... but I feel my body, and the peace outside while flurries are still coming down is it's own cathedral.

A billion blankets is such a wonderful thing. Maybe it's extra noticeable because I live in a such a cold state, but there's something marvelous about being able to crawl under the weight of a number of blankets and be perfectly cozy in an otherwise chilly room.